"Hard Words"
Daniel Valles

READ Proverbs 5-9

In our interpersonal relations with other Christians and family, how do we react when we encounter or receive 'hard words.'  In verse six, we find that true friends will be known for saying what needs to be said.  Questionable 'friends' often garner favor through 'deceit' and flattery.

Proverbs 28:23 says, "He that rebuketh a man afterwards shall find more favour than he that flattereth with the tongue."  People can tell when they are being 'buttered up.'  People can also tell when they are being given sincere and constructive criticism.  The Bible states that your friendship and relationship with someone will grow when you say what needs to said, rather than ignoring it or trying to lever friendship.

Proverbs 27:9 says, "Ointment and perfume rejoice the heart: so doth the sweetness of a man's friend by hearty counsel."  Have you ever walked into a house where potpourri was simmering?  If it is not overpowering, it can be refreshing to the senses.  Perhaps your spouse or friends wear scents that are pleasant to the nose and heart.  The Bible often uses metaphors and similes to help us understand and relate to concepts or to teach a truth.  This verse talks about how thoughtful counsel with friends is a sweetness to the soul.  It is similar to how perfumes "rejoice the heart."

In the 27:6 passage, it uses the word 'faithful' to describe the words coming from a true friend.  What does this mean?  The word 'faithful' here has the idea of support, upholding, and to nourish.  A faithful friend, desiring to support and uphold you, may sometimes have to rebuke you.  The word 'wound' carries the idea of a bruise or bruise-like wound.  Yes, what they say may bruise your ego, but it will heal if you receive it properly.  When a faithful friend comes to you with nourishing rebuke, do not react as though they are dealing a fatal blow or lopping off an appendage.  It is a bruise.  Some are larger than others, yes - the thought we need to remember is: Can we look at our bruise, look up at our faithful friends, smile, and say "thank you, I needed that?"   When was the last time you thanked your sincere friends for not only their hearty counsel, but for their rebuke?